Slut

(Linda)

“Well duh!” I told Trent when he explained his little theory to me.

“You knew they were involved?”

“Of course! I was there, remember? But that’s not important, I’m not hiring you to find out who killed me, doofus! I’m hiring you to find my body. Those twits aren’t going to help you with that, are they?”

“Linda,” he asked pathetically, “Why didn’t you tell me this before? What else aren’t you telling me?”

“Nothing important,” I said, “Just find my body, OK?”

“But I need all the facts to…”

Blah blah blah. I faded out before he could bore me into a second death.

****

“Hi, Mikey-baby!”

“Not now, Linda.”

“What’s the matter, lover? Haven’t you missed me?”

“Umm, lemme think… NO!”

Linda tries her hardest to look hurt. Her bottom lip starts to quiver.

“Awww, Mikey, have you found someone else?”

“LINDA!”

A slender form opens the door a crack, slips through, and closes the door.

“Mikey, you yelling at the walls again? Am I driving you crazy?”

“Fucker!” Linda whispers as she fades from view, “You have found someone else, you slut!”

“Just brushing up on the mad bastard routine, Fly,” Mike said with an easy grin, turning around, “did you get it?”

“Well that depends, Mikey – am I gonna get it?”

Mike sighs. Prison’s a bitch some days. He slides a fiver into the guy’s hand.

Fly pouts.

“Mikey, baby, you know you’ve got more than money that I want, right?”

Mike rolls his eyes and holds out a hand for his package.

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2 Comments

  1. “I faded out before he could bore me into a second death.”

    LULZ.

    You have such funny lines, sometimes Naomi.

    • Hehe – that’s a favourite of mine, too. Should I admit there’s a little bit of Linda in me? 😀


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